Slacker Astronomy Podcast

Slacker Astronomy is a Podcast about astronomy that is actually a lot of fun.

http://www.slackerastronomy.org

One note: they can only go into so much depth on a podcast show. But considering the format, they do an excellent show.

It is rough being 4

My daughter turned 4 yesterday. YAY!

So for her forth birthday she got: a cold, a feaver, a nasty cough, an ear infection, no party, and none of her friends could come over. Also, grandma and papa are off on a cruise so they couldn't even call.

To boot, I'm sure she is still remembering her little brothers birthday (he just turned two in March) who had everyone come over and we had a big party -- his birthday was on Easter.

It is going to take a while to fix this one.

Half-Life 2: Check

So, as of Friday, April 15, 2005, Half Life 2 is complete! I finally finished it.

Might I add: that is one of the odder endings I have encountered.

Few new things from Microsoft

Couple of new items from Microsoft

1. ILMerge: Takes a set of .NET assemblies and merges them into a single assembly.

2. Coding for Fun: a new web site on MSDN. This site covers things like .NET Game development, web development, and all sorts of development tasks that dont involve writing another enterprise database application.

I hate Oracle: Redux

What is the easiest way to piss off a developer? Have a know-nothing-annoying sales shrill call him up during a coding streak.

You know the thing, you are in the zone, code is poring out of you like sweat from an NFL lineman. You bleed logic. Then the phone rings -- rips you out of phase.

"Hello, is this Mr. Chris Brandsma" says a female voice in broken English, obviously from some peninsular shaped country in south Asia. "Yes it is." I reply, ungratefully at best.

The dread doesn't set in until she says "I'm from Oracle" and you know this conversation isn't going to go anywhere. She starts off by asking if this is a bad time. "Yes it is", "Can I call back sometime later, say tomorrow?" "More like next month." "Next MONTH!! But, this will only take 5 minutes, is that OK?"

"OK, 5 minutes"

That was mistake number two. Mistake number one was to answer the phone when caller ID just said "Outside caller", not a good sign. She starts off by saying that I had downloaded something last week...uhm, no, actually I haven't. She insisted. I retorted and got more annoyed. This went on for a couple more go rounds, the she said she miss-read the info and that it was last month. Nope, still wrong. Neither of us are taking this very well now.

So I understand that somewhere in the bowels of the Oracle marketing training camp, that comes with complementary cool-aid and Borg implants, there is some marketing guru that explains to all the nice young inductees that all of their customer are blathering idiots not worthy to like their shoes. I'm sure he is extolling the virtues of Oracle and how it can solve ALL of their customer’s problems. All that these masses of faceless, degenerate customers have to do is hire their consultants and nirvana will commence on the spot.

This is apparent in the next part of the conversation that took place. "Are you starting any initiatives that we at Oracle could help you with?", "No, not really." For some reason, I felt like being honest instead of saying: "Yes, you could leave me alone." But that would have been too honest. "Is there any way we could help you with any current initiatives you are currently working on?" Great, next we can start talking about allocating "resources", heaven forbid you start calling things by what they are: Projects and People. I guess that is not politically correct. But the truth is, this lady was absolutely certain that I had some initiative going on somewhere in some where that Oracle could help me with it -- all she had to do was drag this mythical initiative out of me. Apparently they train these people that their customers are liers too.

It also seems that the training does not come with a stop watch to let the poor cool-aid drinking marketing training inductee know when 5 minutes has passed. She went well over the allotted 5 minutes, and when I told her this she pleaded for another two.

Then I got terse. Something about having a sales shrill (from any company) talking in pointy-haired management/marketing speech trying to get me to discuss what I'm doing as a way to extort more cash does not get me in a good mood. I think my attitude could be best described by some of my more God fearing friends as: Pissy.

My response: "I don’t like Oracle, OK. My current initiatives involve removing Oracle from the planet. Your product ghastly large, the install is astronomical and requires a PHD with the patience of a saint to install." I also said something about reducing the size of the .NET provider (currently 80 MB, while the entire .NET Framework is 24 MB).

Once that tirade had complete I simply said that the 5 minutes was up and hung up on her -- she was still talking. Apparently she still thought I was a potential customer waiting for advice on the latest Oracle initiative.

Unfortunately, I’m still sitting here in a pissy mood, coding mojo gone, and now I’m just waiting for the clock to hit 5:00 pm. I hate sales reps, I hate Oracle, and I hate phone calls while coding.

Here is hoping for tomorrow.

For those of you who think you work with the biggest idiot

Found this site recently, very funny, and unfortunatly all true.

So, compare and contrast the biggest idiot programmer you know with this fine sample.
http://workingwithclueless.blogspot.com/

OK, now I'm old

I admit it, I've gotten old on myself.

As of a few days ago I started thinking about the latest number to be attached to my psyche: thirty. Not one of those numbers that people look forward to, but also not a harbinger of woe either. It just seems that I’m in those average blah years of mediocre disgust.

I’m not really disgusted at life, I have a good family, my oldest child is now 4 and child number three will be arriving shortly. So my kids aren’t old enough to be telling me off or listening to music I disapprove of…yet. My hair isn’t turning grey or thinning, and the lines in my face are only slightly deeper now than before. So like I said, nothing to get really disgusted about, just a little disgusted. You know -- a mediocre disgust. Just prep work for the real disgust that is to come later on in life.

See, this is a way of happily looking forward, and at the same time knowing that it is all down hill from here. I see the signs already. I have already started to vocalize about music that I do not approve of. Clothing styles are popping up, and I can already mentally hear myself staying: “Not on my daughter!” In other words, I’m done for.

We can all now breathe a collective sigh of coming disgust.

Unfortunately, the number thirty also causes large pangs of reflection to occur. Reminiscing about what I’ve accomplished – or not. Professionally I’ve written a lot of code, and I’ve even written about some of it. Some of the code has been really good. Some of it gives more of those mediocre disgust feelings. But the question really lies in one area: are my good years really behind me?

Why do I worry about this? Most of the time, if you are going to do something really cool, you do it in your twenties. Newton devised calculus at 24. Einstein realized the Theory of Relativity at 26. Blasé Pascal created his digital calculator at the ripe age of 22, then two years later, proved that vacuums existed. Granted, in comparison with these people, I’m a moron happily whiling about my day in gratitude that I am not choking on my own spit. But such is life.

I guess I shouldn’t worry too much. Jesus didn’t manage to get himself killed off until he was 31. Many other inventors don’t perfect their ideas until very late in life. John Harrison didn’t figure out the Longitude problem until very late in life (he almost didn’t live long enough to prove he was right). Tomas Edison was 50 when he invented the light bulb. So I guess there is still time.

And that is really point now isn’t it. There is still time, God willing, to do something great. Some people live to long, others don't get enough, and all of that is beyond me. But in the mean time…I still have to raise my kids.